The Parent-Teacher-Child Connection: Kids and Cliques

Monday, June 13, 2011

Kids and Cliques

What happens when your child gets excluded from play? He probably feels sad, depressed, and left out.  However, with a little education from you, he will learn to see the exclusion as a life lesson rather than a life hurdle.  Here are some ideas that your excluded child can understand:
  • Children who exclude children from their play usually want to control the neighborhood or playground.  Psychologists would see this as a rubber-band effect from having too much control at home.  Your child should learn to cultivate friends who accept him without qualifications.
  • When kids say mean things to your child, show him how he can place an invisible shield around himself to insulate him from the mean words.  By allowing the other child's words to bounce away, your child can learn a valuable life lesson.  
  • Ignoring a bully is the best way to stop the bullying behavior.  This is difficult for some kids to understand, but it's a proven fact that no matter the age, if someone bullies another person, that person is looking for negative attention.  Teach your child that when another child excludes him from play, he should simply ignore the request.  If the other child gets violent as a result, that's when it's time to leave and retreat.  
  • Finally, help your child to understand that if another child excludes him from playing with him, he's not worth the association. 
When your child learns this lesson early in life, he'll be better equipped to deal with similar situations in the workplace.

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